Jaffa Cakes are small pieces of confectionery, circular in shape and 54mm in diameter. They have three layers: the sponge cake, the smashing orangey bit (made of orange jelly) and chocolate.
They takes the name from the Jaffa orange, which takes its name from the Palestinian city of Jaffa and is Israel's primary citrus export. Jaffa oranges are good for making jam out of (for the smashing orangey bit) as jaffa oranges are seedless and sweet; have a thick skin so good for transport; are very cold-tolerant and stores well.
The jaffa orange can catch asthma.
Well, at least they can be infected with the Altermania altenata fungus - which destroys the oranges but causes asthma in humans.
The city of Jaffa had a boon in citrus export after the Crimean war Oct 1853 - Feb 1856. This is mainly people squabbling over the fall of the Ottoman empire. Bonaparte stages a coup d'etat in France and takes the throne. He's the last ever monarch of France. After he was captured by the Prussians France became and remains a republic.
Napolean sent a message that France is the soverign authority in the Holy Land. Russia disagrees, France bullies the Ottoman empire into agreeing, the British convince them to change their minds and everyone piles in. War erupts. It kills 143,000 people.
There is a plus-side though. In the wake of the war, in order to rebuild, the people of Jaffa need something cheap and cheerful. The jaffa orange takes the stage.
Citrus production in the middle East declined of course during WWI, but the British Mandate for Palestine brought it back. Which is probably the only good thing the British Mandate for Palestine has ever done.
Jaffa is so famous for its oranges that, like New York is called the Big Apple, Jaffa is called the Big Orange. Jaffa has mostly been incorporated into Tel Aviv, but still remains one of the oldest sea ports in the world, even being mentioned in the Bible.
The main controversy over Jaffa Cakes is whether they are cakes or biscuits. This is because HM Customs and Excise demands VAT on chocolate-covered biscuits (correction by Ian Shuttleworth, thank you) and not on cakes. Because cakes are food. And biscuits are... ...not food? Luxury items, apparently.
Luxury items are subject to VAT, meaning you pay tax on the added value of any particular product. Under VAT you would, say, pay for the materials your business uses (let's say, wood) and you pay the VAT. The raw supplier (who sells you the wood) takes your money, siphons off the bit for VAT and sends it to the government. You then make your product (carve it into a dog) and sell it to the retailer (who sells wooden dog statues in his wooden dog shop). The retailer pays you the money for the stock, and VAT, which you siphon off and give to the government. The retailer sells your wooden dog on to a customer (who collects wooden dogs) and they pay for the dog, plus VAT. Then the retailer, yourself and the man who sells you the wood, reclaim the cost of VAT from the government, meaning you only paid for what you bought. But the customer can't reclaim it, so the government pockets that money and the tax is paid. In America all that doesn't happen, just the customer pays the tax at the end of the line.
Up until 2001 VAT was also charged on woman's sanitary products. This has now been reduced to 5%. Research suggests you could get this down to 0% if you can prove, bizarrely, that it's not only used for what it's designed for - perhaps if you can convince the government it is an item of clothing.
McVities makes Jaffa cakes and so McVities had to go to court to defend their product against HM Customs and Excise (despite VAT being neither a customs tax nor an excise duty). How they won is by claiming the ingredients, texture, appeal to children and name suggest it's a cake. And cakes start soft and go hard when stale, biscuits start hard and go soft when stale. Therefore it is a cake. They even baked a giant Jaffa cake to prove to the judge that jaffa cakes were just miniature cake.
McVities also started the whole digestive biscuit thing. The idea was in 1889 they made a biscuit that you could eat after a meal to help aid your digestion. This was down to the high levels of sodium bicarbonate.
It wasn't until 36 years later they have the brilliant idea of adding chocolate to one side.
It is of course, Gordon Brown's favourite biscuit. Well, eventually any way. In the run-up to the general election he was asked no fewer than 12 times what his favourite biscuit was. He refused to answer until speaking to his advisory panel who told him to go back and say, "A chocolate one."
The record for number of Jaffa cakes eaten in one minute is six. So few because the competitor for the title must entirely finish one Jaffa cake before starting the next, and is not allowed to drink anything whilst doing it.
The advice that I've found states that you should insert the cake chocolate side on your tongue to prevent friction from the cake side, as that could lose your valuable microseconds. Finally, use the smashing orangey bit to aid oral lubrication.
We attempted it and managed 4.5 in a minute in our show.
1-in-10 parents believe that a Jaffa cake is part of your 5-a-day.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Michael Barrymore
NOTE: Again, this is a slightly dry topic. This one and previous Sex Education are quite slim on notes.
British comedian born 1952. In 1993 he was voted the UK's favourite TV star. In 2001 his career collapsed.
He grew up in Bermondsey and later became a Redcoat, going to to present Blankety Blank.
He become a big star, before he starts going a bit weird. He arrives at the White Swan in East London and begins to sing New York New York, adapting the lyrics to announce his homosexuality, whilst still married to his wife.
A lot of his problems were blamed on his friendship with Diana Princess of Wales. After Diana's death, Paul Burrell tried to seduce him. Just goes to show there's nothing of her's he won't steal.
Barrymore has caused major controversy with his back-and-forth nature on his sexuality. He claims he's gay, then he claims he's no longer gay. The ex-gay community mainly centers around bible-belt America, claiming they can help you stop being gay. Many gay campaigners say that your sexuality is hard-wired and cannot be changed, that attempting to change it is simply a form of denial.
Later, a man is found drowned in his swimming pool. He is arrested, released and re-arrested many times, pulled in and out of court before finally being acquitted.
British comedian born 1952. In 1993 he was voted the UK's favourite TV star. In 2001 his career collapsed.
He grew up in Bermondsey and later became a Redcoat, going to to present Blankety Blank.
He become a big star, before he starts going a bit weird. He arrives at the White Swan in East London and begins to sing New York New York, adapting the lyrics to announce his homosexuality, whilst still married to his wife.
A lot of his problems were blamed on his friendship with Diana Princess of Wales. After Diana's death, Paul Burrell tried to seduce him. Just goes to show there's nothing of her's he won't steal.
Barrymore has caused major controversy with his back-and-forth nature on his sexuality. He claims he's gay, then he claims he's no longer gay. The ex-gay community mainly centers around bible-belt America, claiming they can help you stop being gay. Many gay campaigners say that your sexuality is hard-wired and cannot be changed, that attempting to change it is simply a form of denial.
Later, a man is found drowned in his swimming pool. He is arrested, released and re-arrested many times, pulled in and out of court before finally being acquitted.
Sex Education
NOTE: Some of the notes for this session have been lost, meaning this blog is a little stunted until I can find them again. This was compounded due to personal and organisation problems before the show. Apologies for the lack of information. This post will be updated in the future with some better information.
Educating people about sex is a tricky subject. Previously information was passed down through generations, mother to daughter, father to son, vicar to couples, midwives to mothers.
The main problem with understanding sex way back in the day was that humans were very hairy and you couldn't see where anything went. This is part of the reason why we believe that humans have retained pubic hair: as a big arrow.
The sex education we receive currently focuses on the physical mechanical details - although with much more clarity than in the past as attitudes toward educating young people change. There is very little mentioned on the experience of sexual excitement or arousal.
In a 2000 study, the University of Brighton showed that a high percentage of 14-15 year olds were disappointed with the content of their sex education lesssons. And that's teenagers talking about sex!
The Ancient Greeks were a lot less prudish about it. Quite often young boys would learn from older men about the birds and the bees. They took it quite far, though, and many would actually get a physical demonstration. Especially as their believed this is the way that virility was passed on.
Ovid, a Roman writer, also writes rather wryly: "I abhor intercourse that does not relieve both parties. Which is why I receive less pleasure in the company of boys." Cutting.
Willheim Reich had some interesting theories on how our libido works. The libido is a word we've kept from Reich, although many on knowing its true meaning probably wouldn't use it. Reich developed the orgone theory, that the libido was actually a physical thing. He built machines to improve and measure it (called Orgone Event Accumulators). He was exiled from Nazi Germany for his beliefs. And for publishing quite explicit pamphlets on the subject.
His work was so controversial even the US government organised a state-sanctioned burning of his books. He was, to no one's surprise, a friend of Sigmund Freud.
So orgone is sexual energy or libido. If you're curiously you'll be pleased to know it's blue. That's what Reich said. It's blue. Which is also why the sky is blue. Because the sky is sexually aroused when it's sunny. In fact when the sky is cloudy or it's raining, that's a form of astronomical sexual frustration, and Reich even evented machines called cloudbusters (giant metal phalluses, natch) to focus the sexual energy here on earth and use it to blast away the clouds.
William Burroughs, Jack Kerouac and JD Salinger were all big fans of his orgone accumulators. Which is basically just sitting in a big box.
Educating people about sex is a tricky subject. Previously information was passed down through generations, mother to daughter, father to son, vicar to couples, midwives to mothers.
The main problem with understanding sex way back in the day was that humans were very hairy and you couldn't see where anything went. This is part of the reason why we believe that humans have retained pubic hair: as a big arrow.
The sex education we receive currently focuses on the physical mechanical details - although with much more clarity than in the past as attitudes toward educating young people change. There is very little mentioned on the experience of sexual excitement or arousal.
In a 2000 study, the University of Brighton showed that a high percentage of 14-15 year olds were disappointed with the content of their sex education lesssons. And that's teenagers talking about sex!
The Ancient Greeks were a lot less prudish about it. Quite often young boys would learn from older men about the birds and the bees. They took it quite far, though, and many would actually get a physical demonstration. Especially as their believed this is the way that virility was passed on.
Ovid, a Roman writer, also writes rather wryly: "I abhor intercourse that does not relieve both parties. Which is why I receive less pleasure in the company of boys." Cutting.
Willheim Reich had some interesting theories on how our libido works. The libido is a word we've kept from Reich, although many on knowing its true meaning probably wouldn't use it. Reich developed the orgone theory, that the libido was actually a physical thing. He built machines to improve and measure it (called Orgone Event Accumulators). He was exiled from Nazi Germany for his beliefs. And for publishing quite explicit pamphlets on the subject.
His work was so controversial even the US government organised a state-sanctioned burning of his books. He was, to no one's surprise, a friend of Sigmund Freud.
So orgone is sexual energy or libido. If you're curiously you'll be pleased to know it's blue. That's what Reich said. It's blue. Which is also why the sky is blue. Because the sky is sexually aroused when it's sunny. In fact when the sky is cloudy or it's raining, that's a form of astronomical sexual frustration, and Reich even evented machines called cloudbusters (giant metal phalluses, natch) to focus the sexual energy here on earth and use it to blast away the clouds.
William Burroughs, Jack Kerouac and JD Salinger were all big fans of his orgone accumulators. Which is basically just sitting in a big box.
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